Wiccanate Privilege, Wiccanate Privilege, how do we love thee? Let us count the ways…

  1. You are such a completely retarded term that you’re downright offensive.  And if the word retarded was the first in this blog to offend you, you need to go back to the Church you came from, because you’re not paying enough attention. The term Wiccanate being applied to anything not already labeling itself Wicca is like someone telling you that you’re not Lutheran, you’re Catholic-ish. Thus, we love it.
  2. You have continued the fun three-or-four-year theme of creating some trumped up concept of scandal involving Pantheacon, which gets Pantheacon some wonderful free press.  Since Pantheacon is the LARGEST OPEN BAR PAGAN EVENT IN THE WORLD, any press is good press for it. You should come. We can hang out in the New Wiccan Church suite until we’re so sloppy that Sara politely boots us in the direction of the Green Fairy suite which inevitably ends up with everyone back in the LGBT suite because those iron-livered homos just can’t stop, and they won’t stop. Cause it’s we who own the night. Can’t you see it’s we who ‘bout that life?
  3. Vinnie motherfuckin’ Russo wrote a blog about it.  Vinnie is the man. If he pipes up about something long enough to write about it, that means he’s not cooking. And if you can pull the Streghe of New England (move over Lori) away from his stove for that long, you’re a legit movement. Props for that.
  4. You are kind of an oxymoron in a strange way we can’t quite put into one solid term. Wiccanate Privilege™ is about how pagans, playgans (there’s a Pantheacon term for you) and everyone in between who refuses to be labeled in some endless quest to buck all attempts at classification don’t feel included. Wiccanate Privelege is about inclusion, and that is hilarious. Why? Because WICCA IS NOT FOR EVERYONE. Wicca is not inclusive. We don’t want everyone in our cult. We don’t want everyone in our circles. We drive people crazy. We break the mentally weak and unhinged. We are a magnet for the psychologically ill because they need a magical excuse for their insanity. We walk a thin line between reality and subjectivity and blur that line frequently, and with gusto.  That shit is not healthy for lots and lots of people. So the idea that you toss ‘-ate’ on the end of our religion to talk about inclusivity is hilarious. But, is being of the Wica a privilege? Absolutely.
  5. Being allowed in the door to someone else’s ritual means that you are being included. Assuming that you should be paid any attention beyond that just means that you’re an asshole. We do love most things that prove that watered down Wicca is shitty. Take of your clothes practice like the rest of us, or gtfo. Kthxbai.

What’s your take on Wiccanate Privilege?  And if you can direct us to a Wiccanate, we’d love to actually meet one that identifies that way.  We bet they need a drink.

(For a non-douchebag response to the Wiccanate privilege debate, please read our brother Benny’s blog. That’s a true Gardnerian sentiment right there.)


  1. I think it’s nice that people are going out of their way to show me that they’re the folks who really don’t get it, and that I don’t have to waste my time talking to them.

  2. This is a great post.

    I’d also add that I think it’s ironic that a movement that purports itself to want to spread awareness about marginalization and misrepresentation doesn’t use the self-identified label the group the want to educate uses to define itself. Instead, they use a label so insipid it reads as pejorative.

  3. Actually, the word “retarded” is an offensive slur towards the mentally and developmentally disabled, so if the word offended us, that’s why, not because of your trite rant. Get a clue, and educate yourself.

      1. Exactly our point! the term is 100% retarded in a way that is offensive. Also, people using it to complain about others’ rituals are assholes. Fully agreed!

    1. Yes, that was the point. Thank you for pointing that out for those who are ‘mentally and developmentally disabled’ in the reading comprehension department. You’re a true friend.

    1. Quite simple! There are crowns! Being crowned is a lovely privilege. Sadly, there are no photos of actual Wiccanates online, so we thought we’d use legitimate members of the Wicca, in keeping with our theme. Eventually we’ll flat out call Alexandrians Gardnerians, but only when we’re bored and want to stoke some sentiments of individuality. Or piss off the Americans.

  4. I’m on record as calling the word “Wiccanate” clumsy and ungainly. Let me further go on record by calling your post clumsy, ungainly, and a terribly unfortunate ambassador of your faith. Might I suggest pouring kerosene on your keyboard before you further embarrass those Wiccans who know you personally?

    1. Suggestion noted, but we can’t light our keyboard on fire lest the coven and cousins show up to try to run their cattle past it for purification. Spontaneous indoor fires send Gardnerians dancing in circles and we want their attention focused. We agree with your sentiment though.

  5. LOL. Right Farging On! Thank you very much. I thoroughly enjoyed the rant. I help run a public Temple in my spare time and I’ve never heard the term before but, I could immediately ID a couple of people who would use it, God’s Bless ’em. 😉 I Cheers!

  6. You don’t want people to “join your cult,” fine. I most likely never will. This is, of course, why you are now irrelevant in this discussion.

    Besides, it’s wiccanesque, I thought everyone knew that.

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